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Musings from Moyieboy ... |
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It's beer o'clock and all is well |
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January 4, 2018 |
By Ken Carpenter
"Without question, the greatest
invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh,
I grant you that the wheel was also a fine
invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as
well with pizza." ~ Dave Berry
It is likely that many people imbibed more beer
over the holidays than they usually would in a
two-month period. So, just to rub it in a little
bit, I decided to provide a little history to go
with the beerheads.
Mankind has been heaping praise upon beer for
9,000 years or longer. It is thought by many
that the invention of bread and beer hurried the
development of civilization. I'm sure millions
of beer-bellies would agree, if they were
capable of more than gurgling.
The path which humanity chose to tread was
actually changed forever by the thirst for beer.
Sometime around 5000 BC many of the Neolithic
nomads gave up their wandering ways to settle
down to a life of farming. They needed grain to
supply one of their favorite food sources, and
while they liked their bread OK it was the
craving for beer to wash it down with that put
the brakes on their roaming.
A famous Sumerian prayer called "The Hymm to
Ninkasi" was not solely created for religious
purposes. In a time of widespread illiteracy,
incorporating the recipe for beer into a prayer
to a goddess only made good sense. Praise the
Lord and pass the bowl of lager.
They took their beer drinking seriously in
ancient Babylonia too. The Code of Hammurabi (c.
1750 BC) provided the laws of the day, one of
which was a sentence of death for any merchant
caught diluting his beer. Guess they didn't care
for light beer in those days.
In the Middle Ages many of the monasteries in
Europe were renowned for their breweries. The
monks who made the brew were rewarded for their
efforts by being allowed to drink five quarts of
beer every day. I'm surprised they were able to
make beer or anything else besides a healthy
supply of urine. In case you are wondering, beer
was also allowed when the monks were fasting. It
kind of makes a fast sound a little less
daunting doesn't it?
For centuries beer was one of the primary fuels
for the armies of the world. The British Army
once supplied a cash allowance for beer to its
soldiers, and that one penny was good for six
pints of ale per day.
Part of the reason the old Vikings went
"berserk" during battle was the copious amounts
of ale they imbibed beforehand. It seems that
pillaging was always a lot more fun when you
were staggering around.
The high regard for beer extended into the
medical field in the old days too. Amazingly
enough, over 100 illnesses in 1600 BC Egypt were
treated with beer. I find it difficult to
believe that it cured very many real maladies,
but it probably did improve quite a few sour
attitudes and soothe a pain or two. On second
thought, it might have cured half of them.
More than 35 billion gallons of beer are sold
yearly around the globe, producing revenues of
$294.5 billion. The Czechs are the premium beer
swillers on the planet, downing an average of
160 liters per year.
There is a very good reason that Czechoslovakia
leads the world in beer drinking; beer there is
cheaper than Coke. A half-liter costs just 30
cents, while the same amount of Coke is 85 cents
and club soda is 29 cents.
Homer Simpson, a fictional cerevisaphile (beer
enthusiast) of biblical proportions, could die
very happy there. He was once heard to say, "I
would kill everyone in this room for a drop of
sweet beer."
I would quickly agree that Homer goes overboard
with his love for brew.
Then again, it might depend on how many people
were in the room.
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